When you are planning a memorial or celebration of life, music can say what words cannot. It gives people a way to feel, to remember and to be together. If you have been asked to choose the music, or you are doing it for someone you love, here are a few thoughts that may help.
Begin with the person
The best starting point is the person you are remembering. What did they love to listen to? Was there a hymn they sang in church, a song they hummed in the kitchen, or a piece they asked to hear at family gatherings? Music that was truly theirs will often mean more to the people in the room than any well-known choice.
Think about the flow of the service
Most services have a natural shape, and music can support each part of it.
- Gathering: soft, calm music as people arrive and settle. It gives guests a quiet moment before the service begins.
- Opening: a familiar hymn or piece that brings everyone together.
- Reflection: a quiet piece during a eulogy, a slideshow, or a moment of silence.
- Congregational singing: hymns that most people know, so everyone can join in.
- Farewell: a piece that feels hopeful, peaceful or grateful as the service closes.
- Reception: lighter background music while people share stories and food.
Hymns many families turn to
Many people find comfort in traditional hymns, especially when a service is held in a church or has a faith element. Hymns such as Amazing Grace, How Great Thou Art, Abide with Me, The Lord's My Shepherd and In the Garden are widely known and often requested. Because many guests will know the words, they can sing along, which can be a real comfort in itself.
Songs beyond the hymn book
Not every celebration of life is religious, and not every person was a hymn lover. Piano can carry many styles. Classic standards, favourite folk songs, film themes and gentle versions of pop songs can all work beautifully. Choose pieces that fit the person's character, whether they were quiet and thoughtful or full of humour and life.
Practical things to check
A few small details make the day go more smoothly.
- Ask the venue what instrument is available, or whether one will need to be brought in.
- Find out how long each part of the service will be.
- Print the words to any hymns for guests to sing, if you can.
- Let your musician know if there are any pieces that would be too painful, so they can be left out.
Do not worry about getting it perfect
There is no single right answer. If a piece feels true to the person and the family, it is a good choice. A live musician can also help you decide. If you are unsure, share a few ideas and talk it through.
How we can help
JP Music offers live piano and organ music for memorials and celebrations of life in Calgary and the surrounding communities, including Airdrie, Cochrane, Okotoks, Strathmore, High River, Canmore, Crossfield and Didsbury. If you would like help shaping the music for a service, please reach out. We will listen carefully and keep things simple.
Planning something?
Tell Johnson your date and what you have in mind.
